To Fate I Leave This

Bleh

2011-06-15T23:17:00.002+08:00

My blog is dying. Period.

Wait, actually, it's half dead.

WHERE'S MY DEFIBRILLATOR.

Off to Malaysia, last few days of 2010

2010-12-29T00:24:00.003+08:00

Well, it's a few more hours before I'm off to Malaysia. Colmar Tropicale Resort at Berjaya Hills to be exact. I don't know what to expect. Still packing my luggage. And I still need to plan for the barbecue for my MI Mart group. Things to do...

As many people would know, Malaysia is one of the countries I do not respect in this world. I think that they're... Right, let's not go there. If you want to know, ask me personally. It's rather, explicit, to put it simply. And I make no secret of my thoughts.

Like I said to Dylan when I told him that I was leaving today,

"I'm going to my favourite country in this world on the 29th."

"What, Australia?"

"No, think sarcastically."

"Oh, alright, I get it."

So, well, I'm just gonna take things as they come. Who knows? I may enjoy it. But don't expect me to hold Malaysia with any regard soon enough. I'll only be back on the 1st of January... So, yeah. I'll spend the New Year in Malaysia. Happy 2010 in advance? Whatever.

"Better to be caught with your pants down than with your back turned."

Countdown to leaving Sweden

2010-11-16T10:09:00.003+08:00

Last few hours in Sweden. I'm flying off in roughly 9 hours at Copehagen Airport. Damn, this trip has really been too short. I really feel like there's so much more that can be done and so much more to be seen. I really want to stay for a longer period of time, but I can't. Life has to resume for me. I belong to Singapore, and the life there. It's 0315 hours as I type this, and I'm streaming the internet radio broadcast of 987FM. I do miss Singapore, but it's still hard to leave Sweden after spending a very fruitful eleven days here. I have made friends that I will keep, and memories that will last more than a lifetime. Everything just seemed to be perfect on this trip. I don't know why. I've been to China and India with Tanglin Secondary, so this is my first overseas trip with Millennia Institute.

I was thinking to myself the other night, if I didn't come to Millennia Institute, all this wouldn't be happening right now. I would not be experiencing the magnificence of Sweden if not for Millennia Institute. I do believe in this, God has a reason for everything He does.

I'm writing a thank you letter for Desiree and her family now, so I don't think I'm gonna get any sleep tonight. Man, 13,5 hours back to Singapore by plane. I must try to get at least an hour of sleep. Once back in Singapore, it's something spicy for breakfast here I come!

"No matter how the wind howls, the mountain cannot bow to it."

2nd day in Sweden

2010-11-08T03:38:00.002+08:00

Well, it's my 2nd night in Ystad, Sweden. It's cold out, and I mean cold. I'm pretty sure it's below zero degrees right now. 7 hours behind Singapore, that's the time here. I've adjusted though, good for me. I'm sitting in front of the fireplace and typing this out. It's really warm and cosy, to have a fireplace burning on a cold night like this. Well, I still have to pack for tomorrow's trip up to Halmstad, so this post will be a short one. Really enjoying it in Sweden, that's fer sure. It's high time I treated my eyes to the beauty of nature, and Sweden is doing just that to me.

Bittersweet

2010-10-28T23:21:00.003+08:00

Well, I've gotten my posting result for Pre U 1, and I've been promoted to Pre U 2. It is a great feeling to be promoted to Pre U 2, and a start of a whole new and increasingly hectic year come 2011. I must start studying for my Pre U 2 even though the holidays are approaching, just so that my brain doesn't get rusty.

Still, it is a bittersweet feeling to be promoted to Pre U 2. I have friends around me who didn't make it, and to walk past other people who were crying due to the posting result was a pretty wrenching sight. It is not something I ever want to see again. Everyone was mindful over how they behaved today, and even the promoted ones seemed so, dead. No one was in the mood to celebrate as we were all conscious of the fact that there are people around us who didn't make it and celebrating our promotion would be adding salty insult to a bad wound. School just didn't feel right today. It felt like a mockery, laughing at us in an evil manner, ridiculing our pathetic efforts of so-called studying.

I really don't know what to say. I'm flying off to Sweden very soon, and I still need to get some stuff. Sigh. Suddenly, my mood has been dampened by the events of today. I told myself I will finally be able to sleep easier tonight after, I would daresay, the most anxiety-inducing week in Millennia Institute, but will I still be able to after seeing all the sorrow of today?

"Joy and sadness mixed together with fear, anxiety and dread. The result; utter silence."

It's been a long time...

2010-10-26T23:52:00.005+08:00

Hot damn, how long has it been since I last posted here. I keep breaking my promises to myself to post as often as possible on this blog. Ah well, I'm posting now, so this is somewhat making up my own promise? Hahahahaha!

Anyway, I'm flying off to Sweden in less than 2 weeks. The 6th of November, to be exact. Holy crap, my flight is at 1.15 am on a Saturday morning. That means I have to at the airport by 10+ pm? Guess I'll be sleeping on the aircraft. Well, it ain't gonna be a straight flight to Sweden. First we fly to Copenhagen(home of the failed climate talks), before taking a train in to Ystad. I wonder what train are we going to take. The Eurostar perhaps? I don't know. This will be my first trip to Europe, and I'm so excited. It's always been my dream to go to Europe, and I will finally be able to realise that dream. Yeah, baby.

Just a few random pictures I took recently. That Pierre Cardin belt... One of my purchases that hurts me. It cost $60+, and I've only worn it twice. I know it isn't the most expensive belt out there, but I bought it specially for Graduation Night(or any other special occasions I should attend in the future). It's a nice belt, kinda scared I'll damage the leather when I sweat though. Damn.

The other picture is the one I sent for the profile picture for the Sweden exchange trip's blog. Ah, my Diamondback ResponseSport. My 2nd baby, after my golf set. I love riding it, and I love cycling. Come to think of it, I've enjoyed cycling much more after I bought that Diamondback.

12 days to the trip and counting. I need to buy a last few items and I'm all set. I can't wait to meet up with my friends in Sweden again. 12 days and counting. It's lovely.

"A flower that blooms in adversity, is the rarest and most beautiful flower of all."

La la la

2010-08-25T00:01:00.002+08:00

I must start posting something again soon. Hahaha. Just a little random post here, so my blog won't look so dead. I've been really busy as of late.

Sigh. What can I do? I chose this route. No turning back now. I just soldier on with my head held high.

I'm a little lazy to blog

2010-07-08T23:20:00.005+08:00

It's amazing, really. How lazy I am to blog. Well, I must write something, been thinking about my blog and the dust that has been accumulating on it, hahaha.

This week has been a little unusual. Since my exams ended on Tuesday, I have the rest of the week off. And, I've been taking advantage of that. Went out yesterday, went out today, and I'm going out tomorrow. Hoo hoo hoo, there goes all my cash. I watched the film Predators today, didn't really like it, thankfully I only paid $6 for the ticket. Still, I had fun playing LAN games with Benedict, Mustaqim and Hasti. I know some people will say that CounterStrike is past its time, but hey, if you have good teamwork against a bunch of bots whose marksmanship won't allow them to hit a blue whale at 3 metres, then you will have great fun. Especially when the bots all come in a huge swarm for you to slaughter. Jesus Christ, I sound like some gaming nerd.

Regardless of which, I guess I'll still have to take care of my back. Found out yesterday from my chiropractor that I injured my shoulder blade muscles! I guess all those bench presses and crazy swings during golf is finally starting to take their toll. Life ain't that bad so far, I'll say. Yeah, homework is crazy, but it's part and parcel of being in Millennia Institute. After all, I made the choice to come here, I don't regret it. Mr Azman's words still ring clear in my ears: "It will be much crazier after June." That I don't doubt. I must hang on 'til my last breath(wait, not so extreme, right?). I really can crack myself up at times. Still, the motivation is for the trip to Sweden at the end of the year. Then, Argentina next year!!!!

I'm still thinking though, Germany's world cup jersey, buy or don't buy? I really want it. And I also wish they could add a fourth star to the team crest. Damn, now they'll have to wait another 4 years. I've been supporting Germany since the world cup in 2002, so to see them lose to Spain ain't very pleasant. That fucking octopus Paul actually predicted correctly the Spanish victory. Bloody ingrate, you live in a German aquarium for the love of sex! No matter, Germany can still get 3rd place, then in 2014 they can win the world cup! Deutschland Deutschland Deutschaland!

Yes, this is a monitor lizard. It may not look big in the picture, but mind you, this was taken at Orchid Country Club's Dendro course. Dude! You have a monitor lizard this huge living on the course, now that is something. This brings me back to my golf game last year in Batam. I asked my caddy as my flight was passing by a large pond with mangrove plants,

Me: "Abang, over here got crocodiles or not?"

Caddy: "Not today, not today."

Me: "Not today!? You mean there may be crocs? FASTER DRIVE!"

Come to think of it, the green wasn't that far from the pond. Not that I was scared of a crocodile greeting us "hello", I don't want to be chipping my ball out of the rough and have a crocodile 10 feet long just mere inches away from my ass. Food for thought? Well, up to each individual's self-perception.

"To embrace a stranger as one's own; Possibly one of humanity's most magnificent acts of compassion."

Well, bleah.

2010-06-24T22:09:00.006+08:00

Well, I'm at my uncle's house in Seng Kang. I'm staying here for the night, 18 hole golf game tomorrow morning at Orchid Country Club! I'm really looking forward to that. Listening to 987FM as I blog, and will continue doing so as I study. Still, study, fuck it. The 1st promotional exams are next week, and I have to say I'm not totally prepared for it. Tomorrow, there is still the 4E4 '09 outing. I'm not sure whether I'll be going. It depends whether I have enough energy for the night, because I still have training on Saturday.

Simone invited me to her church, I've been giving it some thought on whether I want to go because there'll be a guest speaker this coming Saturday. I know, I'm not the religious type, but people can change right? The holidays are winding down in less than 5 days. The proposal for the Sweden trip has been submitted, now we have to face the music(I know I should use a more positive term for this but I don't know what other term to use) from the teachers after the exams are over on whether the proposal is acceptable. Frankly, it's bloody impossible to find consignment goods for batik in Singapore. I must have walked half of Arab Street with Lutfi but we found shit.

Damn, I really want to do well in everything I do. Please, I don't want to be in a hole again.

"A relationship may be more detrimental than one expects. Catastrophe could be nearer than you think."

FUCK

2010-06-06T00:20:00.003+08:00

When I thought I had solved the problem with that person, here comes another one. Only that, the seriousness of the situation is much worse now. Why? I meant no harm. I did it on the behalf on someone else. I don't think it's ever gonna be the same. Ever.

You meet all kinds on the road

2010-06-03T23:39:00.002+08:00

Yay, I finally had my first golf game in like, 6 months? Shit, man. I really need to start playing more often. Once I get onto the golf course, my whole game went screwy. Still, I enjoyed my game. Today, I play at Orchid Country club. Great weather, and glorious wind. Sunny with a touch of cloudiness. After I was done, I took a cab home. Over my few years of playing golf, I have taken quite a few cabs to get home. I have met many kinds of cab driver. Most are good, but some are total ass holes. The cab driver I got today was excellent, plus he had a rather interesting story to tell, and I had a marvellous time talking to him all the way home. In a nutshell, he was successful in the past, but his business failed. So after 1.5 years of being jobless, he finally became a cab driver. Turns out, he has only been driving for 13 days. Damn, it's not even two weeks! I was his last fare of the day, as he was going home after dropping me off. It kind of brings me back to last year, the day of my graduation night. I took a cab to Concorde Hotel, and that cab driver who drove me there was going to have his license suspended for 2 years in 2 weeks time. He even showed me the letter from the traffic police. I was one of his last few fares, just to say. Needless to say, you meet all kinds of people on the road.

"I think, therefore I am."

I wish I had a car

2010-05-31T23:54:00.006+08:00

Lately, I've been thinking about, or more likely dreaming about how awesome it would be to have my own car. Yes, I know road tax, ERP, motor insurance, COE and petrol all cost a ton of money, but I'm thinking of this on the perception "if I can afford all that and more".

The pictures seen here are of the BMW M5, Audi RS6 and Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution X. I could totally imagine myself driving to school into any one of these cars. Hot damn, won't it be cool pulling into MI's compound with a hot ride like those. No more relegating myself to public transport to get me where I want to go. Not that I mind taking public transport, it's just that having my own form of transportation would be so much more convenient, not to mention cooler. It would be easier for me to get to my golf games too, now that I am controlling my time to get to my destination. Obviously, I would take the effort to wash and polish my car every other weekend. What's the use of having a beautiful car if it doesn't look good? I can totally picture myself speeding my car down long stretches of road at night, when the air is cool and hardly anyone is on the road. I feel that having a drive is one of the best ways to relax, well, besides playing golf. Man, revving those beautiful V10/Inline 4-cylinder 16 valve engines. Not that I wanted to attract any attention, but with such a great car, how can you not attract attention?

Well, apart from my desires, I have yet to get started on the powerpoint presentation for the Sweden trip. Damn it, it's due on the 18th of June, and I have yet to come up with anything. I still need to check out that batik supplier. I need to work faster. But, my extra classes come first. I just got word that some extra classes have been cancelled, so that should free up some time. I still want to tear up the mountain biking trail at Diary Farm/Bukit Timah during the holidays, most possibly with Emmanuel. I seriously can't wait. That Diamondback mountain bike of mine is just waiting to be tested, and hell yes, I am gonna tear up the trail. Today, I had a lecture which I skipped before the stupid thing even started. Heard it was a real bore. The interesting fact was that, I turned down an opportunity to make more money. I love the feel of money in my pocket, and I got real sore after losing out on a potential $420 from my previous job. I went for some post-MI Mart interview, and the teacher asked me whether I wanted to sign up for this business mentoring program. In a nutshell, I get to create my own business plan, from what I want to sell to possibly even the location I want to do it at, all under the mentoring of successful entrepreneurs. Man, it is very much a tempting offer, one which I would really take. Only, I have to juggle my studies too, and this program requires commitment, which is something I'm not really willing to give. I didn't join a heavy duty CCA for that matter too. Although I could seriously make some spare cash and buy some things I have been drooling over, studies still come first. Hopefully there will be more chances in the future, because I don't want to screw up my time here in Millennia and risk repeating any of my academic years.

That "snowball" is the gift from Jimmy Egeriis. It's made of glass, a Swedish product. It looks breathtakingly splendid when it has a burning flame within it. It's just like an orb, only more oddly shaped, but more brilliant. Now, all I need to do is to get some of those scented candles. Then my room would smell wonderful, and also be bathed in this warm glaze of light refracted through the glass "snowball".

"It takes many men to form an army, but only one man to lead it."

Screw it.

2010-05-17T00:24:00.004+08:00

I think I've pretty much screwed myself this week. I didn't study on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. And I barely studied on Sunday. Fucking curses.

If this keeps up, there goes my promo, here comes a possible retention, and goodbye trip to Sweden. Shit.

"Be fast and efficient. Delay and you perish. Period."

New 2.4km run timing!

2010-05-13T23:46:00.006+08:00

Well, this is my first post since I hosted Jimmy. It was a marvellous time spent with him, 28th April to 9th May. I will sure be glad to see him in Sweden come November.

This was taken today in Management of Business tutorial. Not the first time I've taken a picture of Alfred while he's asleep. This photograph was taken by Maxine. Amazing, how being drunk can make on sleep in any position. Hopefully, or un-hopefully, Alfred will not(or will) see this picture, and the other picture of him taken while he was asleep. I think I may create a photo album featuring his sleeping photographs on my Facebook profile, providing I accumulate enough photographs of him sleeping.

So today, I had to do the 2.4km run for NAPFA. Oh, how I hate it. I'd rather go hiking for 3 hours at Bukit Timah hill and battle with mozzies. Still, I clocked my best timing for my 2.4km run so far. Last year's timing of I think 17 minutes, I did it in 16 minutes 30 seconds today. Shaved off 30 seconds. Not too bad, considering the fact I haven't been running much. I want to shave off more, then one day I will pass that lambasted run. But I really do have to thank Atikah. She and the rest of 10A2 were resting at the stands, and as I was rounding the bend and starting my last 100 metres, she yelled out a very motivational sentence at me, and that sentence put my body into "overdrive"(or what I would call it). I started sprinting for the last 100 metres. My legs nearly gave out before the finish line, but I persevered and I crossed the finish line still running. Man, it felt good. I should do that more often.

"Sweat Dripping. Sunlight piercing. Forced breathing. The crowd cheering. A victory and a defeat."

My old diary

2010-04-24T23:44:00.008+08:00

I was flipping through my old school diary the other day, and there were just so many memories I could recall just by skimming the whole thing. I never used the handbook provided to me by Tanglin Secondary, namely because I felt that it was unsightly and there was never enough space to write your stuff down. I remember, inside there were not only the penning down of reminders of homework and other miscellaneous stuff to hand in, there were also nonsensical but stupidly funny scribblings courtesy of my friends. That was the diary that lasted me through 2009, which was also the year of my 3rd and last Singapore Youth Festival. I'm not gonna take part in any more SYFs in time in Millennia. I'm gonna find another CCA to occupy my time.

The last entry into my school diary was on the 30th of September 2009, Wednesday. I wrote a reminder to hand in an essay for the graduation newsletter on the following Monday. After that, I did not write anything else for the rest of the week. In fact, that was the only entry for that week. The following Monday was the 5th of October. The diary had a little ribbon in it that I used to bookmark the next page for the following week's entries. That ribbon has remained there til today, a small reminder to the last few pages I was ever gonna write in.

So far, it has been a rather uneventful week. Went out for more fundraising today at Mustaqim's house. Not to mention, I had my most laid back day in Millennia so far. Wanna try 7 periods/4 hours & 40 minutes of no lesson? Yeah, Dylan and I had that. We had too much breaks until we wanted to break. We were so damn bored that we just wanted to go for P.E. and end the day faster. For once, I wished I had lessons. Shi Jie, Maxine, Felicia and Janice will know what I'm talking about. My class has shrunk from 36 people to 34 people, most recently after the withdrawal of Dinesh. Damn, I'll miss that guy.

The Swedish students are coming next week for the exchange program, so hopefully everything will be smooth from the 28th of April to the 9th of May.

Alfred the Sleeping Drunkard

"A leader is not a dictator, but a dictator is still a leader."

You Are Not Alone?

2010-04-16T23:31:00.006+08:00

Today happened, the funniest occurrence that has happened to me in Millennia so far. The school's PA system was fried by a bad lightening strike yesterday, so it was being fixed today. 10A2 was having finishing up GP class, and Mrs Meya was giving the class a little reminder, "do you guys think that you are the only people who exist in this world?" & "you guys think you're alone on this earth?", cos the class didn't do some work given to us, including me. I lost my copy. Hahaha. Then, as Mrs Meya was finishing up the 2nd sentence, Michael Jackson's "You Are Not Alone" suddenly came playing over the PA system. It was a total ironic moment, because it was the total opposite of what Mrs Meya was saying to us. Just imagine, "You are not alone, I am here with you". The whole class burst out laughing. It was an absolutely hilarious moment.

So far,I've been hitting the gym quite a fair bit. I wanted to play golf today, but my muscles were felt tired, so I decided not to play. Damn, man. At this rate, I fear my swing may be messed up. I'm going to the range tomorrow, hopefully my swing will still be smooth. I guess all this muscle fatigue is worth it, once I slim down, I'll look back and appreciate all that I have done to achieve a better physique.

Oh yeah, I just remembered, I have yet to collect my testimonial. No matter, I'll take my time to collect it. I'm too cooped up with my own activities anyway.

"A loss is just a minor setback. Losing confidence in yourself is equivalent to death."

I'm 17!

2010-03-27T23:24:00.008+08:00

It's my time to celebrate! I'm finally 17 years old!

27/3/1993. 2242 hours. That's when I came into this world.

The surname is Lee. Possibly one of the greatest surnames in the world.

"If you want a symbolic act; Don't burn a flag, wash it."

The 25th of March 2010

2010-03-25T23:27:00.005+08:00

I really should blog more often. Why am I saying this? My blog can be a little dead at times, so there.

The picture below is kinda overdue. It was taken when students from Koyo High School visited Millennia. The girls are Japanese, so I guess kawa-ii culture is somewhat influencing them. Who am I to comment? I ain't Japanese, I'm Singaporean. I love Japanese food though, in particular sashimi! Well, thanks to Alfred, he asked those Japanese girls whether I could take a picture with them. They agreed. Well, I guess it was only fair after I set Alfred up with two other girls to take a photograph with them while I scooted away to the rear of the canteen. At least Hasti was there to share the glory. It was alright, I guess(I should really find a better word to use, shit).

Well, I posted a status update on my Facebook profile earlier this week. It read :I miss by baby soooo much. When are you coming back?

For people who are curious, it is actually a trick test. I wanted to see how many people will actually fall for it. It was successful, which I am quite pleased to say. Hate me for that if you want to, there could be more in the future. The "baby" in which I am referring to is actually my Sony Ericsson W705. It has been in the repair shop for so long already, I was supposed to get it back today, but the service centre texted me to inform me that there was a delay in parts, and now I may have to wait an additional 1-2 weeks to get my cellphone back. Come back to me, my baby. I miss you.

Alfred got me a birthday gift already. Now to get him one. Dylan, Mustaqim, suggestions? I'm thinking a bottle of 1958 vintage red wine. Wait, did they even make good vintage wines in that year?

"The solution to all problems first begin with a plan."

Funny dialogue

2010-03-04T23:17:00.003+08:00

Today, as I was queuing up for food with Dylan, he suddenly asked me, "Are you a patriot?"

Obviously, I replied yes, because I am a patriot. I love my country. But, I added on some other "opinions" of mine. I left out some parts, though. What I deem to be politically proper may not sit well with everyone.

Dylan: Are you a patriot?

Me: Yup.

Dylan: Why? You love your country that you'll die for her?

Me: Well, if I'm a soldier, yes. But if I'm a civilian, see how first.

Dylan: *Laughs*

Me: Remember, Dylan. If I am a soldier, I will fight. If I have a gun, I will shoot. If I have a grenade, I'll throw it. If I have a knife, I'll stab. But if you give me a pretty girl and gun, I'll take the girl and run!

Dylan: *Laughs harder*

Well, it may not seem funny when it is typed out, but it was pretty hilarious when we were talking. I still can't believe the random shit that will come out of my mind when I start thinking "straight". I love the person who I am.

And Alfred, I think I'll start calling you "hong hong". Felicia thinks it sounds gay, but since you call me "teng yang", it's some sort of revenge, you drunken master(coined by Mustaqim, not me).

Ah, tomorrow is Sports Day, or I think that's what Millennia Institute calls it. Who cares, I think I'm gonna hit the gym. I need to trim up, and I want a bike. I have an infinite wish list. Lastly, I have developed a liking for the new song from We The Kings Featuring Demi Lovato, "We'll Be A Dream". Although the song is pretty much similar to the song "Lost Then Found" done by Leona Lewis featuring OneRepublic, I feel that "We'll Be A Dream" is so much more... meaningful, to put it simply.

"Leadership is the virtue of great men and ordinary people alike."

1 month in Millennia Institute

2010-03-03T23:09:00.002+08:00

Well, I have nothing much to blog about lately, to be frank.

Bottom line is, it's been a month, and the homework load is starting to pile on, bit by bit. I must start to learn how to manage my time in a more efficient manner so as to milk out the most of books. I need to start studying during breaks. I had a 2 hour break today and I didn't spend one minute of it studying! I should really hit myself in the head. And I still need to get the MOB notes from Ming Li. I pay $50 for a fucking textbook that weighs, I don't know, 2 kilograms, and Ming Li has a bunch of notes which is so much more detailed than that $50 piece of bullshit.

My day today, started off like in a stupid manner. The moment my class entered the tutorial room, our home tutor started nagging at us, I don't know what for. Bunch of administrative crap that needs to be settled can really make one a prick. My home tutor starts scolding Mustaqim and another classmate for reasons only god knows. Crazy woman. There was nothing to do for the 1st period, so I decided to take a short nap as I was feeling deprived of my sleep(well, somewhat), and my co-home tutor had to wake me up to read some stupid handout. Come on, cut us some slack, 10A2 needs to warm up before classes start.

Spent almost 2 hours in the gym after school, I really need to start working out if I want to be doing chin-ups by the time I'm in pre-u 3. There's still P.E tomorrow, and I'm expecting more running. No fear, my leg muscles will just ache until Sunday, then Monday will start a new cycle. The MILO MOE Youth Triathlon is in 2 weeks, and I've yet to get a bike to practice my cycling! I need to hasten my pace.

"Live life well, it is the greatest revenge."

(Breathes in and out)

2010-02-17T22:14:00.003+08:00

Yeah, so I've officially started lessons proper. Class 10A2. I'm gonna make it a commitment to pass at least two H2 subjects, even better if I pass all three subjects. Millennia Institute is new territory for me, but that doesn't mean I won't conquer it. I left Tanglin Secondary with a reputation, and I will do the same when I leave Millennia Institute. I need to trim myself up and also maintain a good record, in both academics and discipline.

*Drums fingers on tables, and takes a deep breathe*

I don't really want to say much, I'm just glad that I have friends around me to go through all this with me. Kinda makes the situation easier to handle. I hope. And I really want to drop my Chinese. Can I do such a thing!? I hate learning that shit.

"To recover from a fall, one must first eliminate the biggest threat in front of him."

7(-1) days in MI

2010-02-05T22:46:00.010+08:00

Well, I've just completed 6 schooling days in Millennia Institute, albeit it all being orientation(I didn't attend school last Friday). As of last Thursday, 28th January, I am officially a student of Millennia Institute. So now, completing my first 7 schooling days, I have to say that the first few of orientation were ludicrously BORING. Like come on, dumb talks and lame icebreaking activities? Doesn't the government employ creative people? Use those chaps to make the whole span of our orientation fun. I was falling asleep for like 60% of the talks and lectures, which was inappropriate, but it was so god damn boring that it actually lulled me to sleep. Luckily, I didn't snore.

Still, one good thing about the first few days of orientation is that I got to know this group of guys whom I befriended. For Millennia's orientation, there were 4 clans, Fujiwara, Tachibana, Taira and Minamoto, and in each clan there were 4 groups. For me, I was in Fujiwara 3. And in Fujiwara 3, there are only 10 guys including me, the rest are girls. Excluding 2 chaps who were always missing for unknown reasons, there were just 8 guys left. These 7 guys; Benedict, Ashwin, Muas, Yeow Chong, Heng Wei, Earnest "Barker Road Bob" and Andreas. These are the guys whom I befriended and we have been through this week of orientation together. Up till Wednesday, it was mostly monotonous talks, so we couldn't really see the expressive sides of each other's personalities. The most that really happened to us lot was getting a scolding from the teachers for making too much unnecessary noise during a lecture. But came yesterday, it changed.

Yesterday, there was a game organized for all the clans. It was something like a relay race; the first person had to run to flag the next person who would start rolling a ball. Each clan's group had to send like 8 people each as the balls that were to be rolled were of varying sizes(basketball, rugby ball, tennis ball, etc.). Pity though, my group lost, but we all had awesome fun playing the game. Spurring on our group mates who were still playing the game helped to rally each other's spirits to reach the end. I was second in the relay, rolling the basketball. Now, when I laugh or cough, my sides hurt due to me not warming up properly before the games. Ah, what the heck, it was worth it! After that, there were more sleep-inducing lectures and talks which could have really put me to sleep, but somehow I managed to stay awake. The interesting bit was after all that nonsense blaring, there was this activity called "MI Dance". To be truthful, I have 2(or maybe 4) left feet when it comes to dancing. But yesterday, the dancing wasn't as bad as I expected, maybe because I was dancing together with a girl. Somehow or another, it changed by perspective towards dancing. But only by a little.

Today, MI started off the last day of orientation with the "MI Dance" first thing in the morning. Yesterday, the guys were assigned partners. Today, the girls were assigned partners. By now, I was relatively neutral to the dance, but what sweetened up this morning's dance was me getting paired up with this Malay girl named Natasha, and she is quite attractive. The "MI Dance" is some sort of Tango. So on top of the steps which all the Pre-U 1s already knew(some cha-cha steps), the finisher was to have both parties come together in some "Tango-Waltz embrace". I'm not giving out too many details, but to put it simply, it felt very relaxing(especially when you have an attractive girl as your partner). In fact, I was smiling as I danced. And that is a first for me.

After the dance, the clans were separated and given some time to come out with some cheers, a short skit or dance and a mascot for the clan performance later in the afternoon. Ideas were a little slow to flow in, and Fujiwara's response was kinda lacklustre in the beginning. But after some practice, and a break, things mostly fell into place. Fujiwara's performance was a short skit consisting of 2 dance "remixes" of Super Junior's "Sorry Sorry" and The Wonder Girls' "Nobody". Muas and I had to act out that we were watching some video on my cellphone while the other 6 guys and a few other Fujiwara members danced to the tune. Coupled together with some of my "signature dialogue" and cheers, the whole performance fell into place. And for that, our efforts were duly rewarded when Fujiwara won the prize for the best clan performance.

Millennia finished up the orientation with each clan's photo taking. A wild bunch, that's what we can be. After that, Fujiwara 3 had their photo taken, and I had my photo taken with Benedict, Yeow Chong, Heng Wei, Ashwin, Earnest "Barker Road Bob", Andreas, Muas, two other girls from Fujiwara 3 and our orientation group leader Ming Li. Thinking of all the shit we gave Ming Li to handle, one of the guys came up with a brilliant idea of giving Ming Li a "thank you" note with the thanks from Fujiwara 3. Oh yeah, I love this shit.

To the people whose names were mentioned in this post, regardless of whether you people see this or not, I would like to thank all of you for making my first week in Millennia Institute memorable. This orientation may be over, but it will live on in our thoughts.

"Time is not your enemy, it is your ally, for the contribution of your memories; good or bad."

Being superficial and having the right to cry.

2010-01-17T23:15:00.008+08:00

So, I went to meet Samantha and Yu Xin on Friday. Apparently those two girls think guys are very superficial. All it takes is for one pretty girl to walk past a group of guys and the next moment all them guys will be turning their heads to look at that pretty girl. Maybe it's true, when I see a pretty girl, I will turn back and take a look.

But like, come on! Isn't it like the nature of men to oogle at pretty girls? Yu Xin, it doesn't really matter whether hot females are plastic either. Look at Nicole Scherzinger, Megan Fox or Lin Chi-ling. So what if they are plastic, guys drool over them. But for the record, I don't drool. I just go "Man, she's hot." I guess it's just some sort of "appreciation" I have, or is it shared but many guys? The fact that guys appreciate the sight of a good looking female is the one characteristic that makes up a male.

On a more serious note, I just watched this program called "Inside" on the National Geographic Channel. The topic featured on that episode was the Green Berets, also known as the United States Army Special Forces, on their tour of duty in Afghanistan. The program showed us the dangers faced by the men who were stationed at a forward operating base in Taleban-held territory, and how they got by each passing fragment of time in a war-torn country. The threat of an enemy attack is always imminent, and improvised explosived devices are lying everywhere. The soldiers of the Green Berets not only have to combat the threat of the Taleban, but they also have to win over the hearts and minds of the Afghan people.

But sometimes, to win over the Afghan people may be harder than it looks as firefights with the Taleban is part of parcel of the war in Afghanistan. Innocent Afghan civilians could be killed in the firefight along with Taleban fighters. I guess collateral damage is inevitable, it will always happen no matter how hard one tries to avoid it. The program finishes up with a life changing event, in which the team of Green Berets and National Geographic camera operators had an improvised explosive device detonate upon them. The explosion killed and wounded 7 people, among them the two National Geographic camera operators. According to the program, it was the single deadliest improvised explosive device attack on a group of American soldiers.

The two people killed were Green Berets, and one of them was a father of two. His send-off was solemn, and when his coffin was loaded on the transport aircraft to be sent back to the his family in the USA, his comrades had the time to pay their final respect to their fallen brother-in-arms. Seeing the dead soldier's comrades shed tears as they paid their final respects was testimony to the fact; Even brave men have the right to cry.

"To fight power with power will ultimately result in the destruction of both sides."

Last trip of the y3ar to Batam

2009-12-24T00:02:00.013+08:00

My 4th and last trip to Batam for the year, and I arrived back around 4 pm yesterday.

It has been a peaceful 2 days at Batam. Frankly, I went there with a sour mood, because of some problems. But on the ferry towards Batam, I just listened to music and enjoyed the strong breeze. It felt really great, and by the time I got to Batam, I felt much better to play a good game of golf. And to that, I did play a good game of golf. I played a 96, which was better than my old score of 99 by 3 strokes. My old score was set last year at NSRCC Changi on the 23rd of October, so to finally beat my old score is really something important to me. Furthermore, I played from the blue tees.

After playing a 96 on Tuesday, I told myself that I am going back to Singapore with two games of 90s under my belt. And what I promised myself, I accomplished it. I played a 96 today too, and that was a really sweet deal. I've never played the same score for two games, so to play two games like this really made my day.

Going back to Singapore, I felt more like my normal self. This final trip to Batam really calmed me down and reverted me back to the Lee Thern Yang I've always known myself to be. So now, I have set a new record score for myself. Now, I have to break it once again. So let the new competition begin!

"I am my own man. I am my own life. I am who I am."

Bloody interesting week

2009-12-18T23:19:00.004+08:00

Right, so this has been an interesting week, cos I've had 2 unexpected surprises in a span of 3 days.

Even so, my first 18 hole golf game at Marina Bay golf course on Thursday was screwed because of this absolutely cocky Korean who joined my flight. But, I shall not talk about that. Playing at Marina Bay golf course was a nice experience, considering the fact that the scenary was beautiful and the air was fresh. Furthermore, I may be going back there to play another game next week, cos I may not be able to go to Batam for the 4th time this year. Reason being, my old man thinks I've been to Batam too many times this year(I've only gone there 3 times this year).

The first surprise this week was on Wednesday, when I was walking through Mandrin Gallery. A staff member of the mall approached me and told me that Mandrin Gallery was having a promotion, and what I had to do was to give them my name, contact number and email address, and I would get a $50 voucher in return. So I filled in my "particulars", and that $50 voucher was mine. I made a sucker outta the guy who approached me, but seriously, I don't care. I got a $50 voucher which I can spend at any store in Mandrin Gallery, so it's the Adidas store I go!

The second surprise was this morning. I was sleeping after spending a whole night out, and my sisters arrived home from church camp just then. I think Yi Ling went through the mail, and saw that I had a letter for some "edusave award". She proceeded to enter to my room and holler at the top of her lungs, "Thern Yang! You have a letter for some edusave thingy! Wake up!" I do not know what time it was, but I was still pretty tired. And obviously I wasn't at all pleased at Yi Ling disturbing my beauty sleep and I couldn't be bothered about what she was saying, so I yelled back at her, "Get outta my room! I'm trying to sleep!" Still, when I woke up, I went to check whether I really had a letter for some "edusave award". It turned out to be a Good Progress Award from South West CDC and Taman Jurong Citizens' Consultative Committee. The award is a $200 voucher, and I think I will be recieving it from Tanglin next year. Frankly, I was a little sceptical about recieving this award. Did I really have that much progress in my studies? Whatever it is, I am elated to have 2 unexpected surprises in one week.

Anyway, I had a class BBQ yesterday. Reached there past 1930 hours after I was done with my golf game. Ate, talked, played. For once, I was able to spend the whole night out(cos my parents don't usually allow me to spend the whole night out). Me, Jeremy, Shafeeq, Firdhouse, Raynee, Sheryl, Joshua, Bernard, Eriza, Sherlyn and Ding Li spent the night relaxing and talking. Sherlyn and Dingl Li left for home earlier, while I went home around 0645 hours with Jeremy. Slept at 0730 hours, woke up at 1230 hours, went to swim with Sean at 1730 hours. Luckily I went to swim with Sean, or else I would be spending my whole day at home staring at the computer screen.

That does it for now. I will blog again when I feel like it. It will be more often though, considering now that I have more mood to blog. Whee....

"Everyone is beautiful in their own way, and no one can ever change that beauty."

I just don't get it.

2009-12-12T23:25:00.003+08:00

Somehow, I just don't understand why sometimes my life seems like an open book. I don't want people to read me like a book. I want to be more like a diary, privacy must be respected. I just feel insecure, when people are finding out about what I've been doing even though I don't reveal it.

I'm not going to coop up everything in my head, but I'll let it out but by bit. If I ever see the need for it.

"I'll never die bleeding. I'll die bleeding and fighting."

Things that have changed, part 3

2009-12-01T23:37:00.013+08:00

Flashback; 10th November 2007.
I was at Super Import Nights 2007, walking towards the drift demonstration area when from approximately 50 metres away, I saw a girl who looked really familiar, but I just couldn't put my finger on where had I exactly seen her before.

Back to the present day. Today, this post is going to be about that girl, and her name is Goh J-ing. Even though I first saw J-ing at Super Import Nights 2007, it was only until the time when school began, when I got to know her. Reason being, we had an interesting conversation during one of the first few chinese lessons of the year. And from then on, we became friends.

Throughout the year 2008, interaction was kinda limited, but let's forget about that. One of the most memorable things J-ing did for me this year was the text message she sent me on my birthday. To tell the truth, I wasn't expecting one from her, but she did sent a happy birthday text to me. That really made my day, and a huge smile on my face.

J-ing also helped me through a tough period this year. My pride and ego had taken a real heavy beating, and J-ing rendered me help and advice to help me get over that predicament. J-ing has been through the same situation before, so the support and help she provided me was tremendously useful, and I truly appreciate her for that. That literally opened up my eyes on what kind of a person J-ing actually was. It suddenly occurred to me, the friendship between the two of us had much more to yield.

J-ing has always been the kind of girl who puts her effort and determination into whatever she does, and I respect her immensely for that. She has always been a hard worker, and a person who doesn't back down in the face of defeat. Such steadfastness of her level is not something one would see everyday, and I really have to give it to her for the courage she possesses.

J-ing, for all that you've done for me this year, I owe you a debt of gratitude. I really am thankful for having you in my life, and your presence will always be remembered. And, l always be there for you as a friend you can fall back on.

"Tears. The soul's expression of a free flowing spirit."

Things that have changed, part 2

2009-11-26T23:42:00.004+08:00

So, this is the 2nd part of my feature of people around me who have changed, in a good way. Today, that featured person is Sandra Goh.

I first met Sandra in Secondary 3, as we were in the same chinese class. Strangely though, we hardly interacted last year. But never mind that, throughout this year, we have had plenty of good conversations. I can't remember a time when we had a conversation, and we did not have a good time talking to each other. I think this is due to her uncanny ability to find a topic to talk about, as she is always the girl who is full of life, the girl who has an attitude akin to a fizzy drink.

Some of the facts I truly appreciate about Sandra is that she and I share some common interests. For starters, we both have a penchant for the english language, and I feel that this has allowed me to connect with her on a more diverse level, reason being I am able to learn from her new words which I have yet to come across. Secondly, we both can't stand chinese. Chinese lesson is a total bore to Sandra, and since June, she(and I) can't really be bothered to give two hoots about the work that we are given in chinese class. She would usually just push it to one side and do her own thing, or I would have a conversation with her which would span the entire chinese lesson. Thirdly, Sandra and I have a common pet hate, although I can't divulge that information here, let's just say... Sandra can't stand the existence of that person of much as I do.

One outstanding fact that I truly admire about Sandra is her skill in taking photographs. Sandra really utilizes that Nikon DSLR camera she has to its every possible technological limit so as to obtain simple yet tasteful pictures. Be it taking pictures of her dog or stray cats, scenery or everyday objects that most of us would regard as insignificant, Sandra can photograph it in such an angle that makes it aesthetically pleasing to view.

Lastly, I've never told Sandra this, but now I shall. She unknowingly made me reconsider my actions about a certain plan I was going to undertake. All I can say is that, knowing her is actually making me re-think whether I should carry out with this plan of mine. But whatever the case, I still want to thank her for everything. For all the times that we've shared, thank you Sandra. I will really miss the times we've spent slacking in chinese class, talking non-stop even when the teacher gave us work, and the fun we've had in this short but fruitful year.

"Appreciating a friend is one thing, treasuring a friend is another."

Back from Batam

2009-11-25T22:33:00.006+08:00

My first overseas trip since my O levels were over, and I just came back from Batam not long ago. I arrived back at Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal at 1600 hours, and my welcome was having the waves pound the retarded ferry against the pier repeatly. It nearly gave me a bloody headache. Played 2 golf games again, this time I got a really bad sun burn to go along with the fun I had. My neck and face is all red, but I'm not feeling as tired as I was back in June when I went to Batam.

Suprisingly, I met my uncle and cousin after I finished my game today. I was walking back to my buggy, when suddenly, someone shouted my name, and the buggy that was driving towards me had my uncle and cousin in it. "It's really funny, I have never ran into you in Singapore, but I run into you in Batam. Small world eh?" Famous words spoken by my uncle. I'll be arranging to go back to Indonesia with my uncle and cousin in a few weeks time, can't wait for that, cos I love the relaxed mood of playing in Indonesia. You don't have bloody fucked up marshals nipping at your ass asking you to hit your ball faster and progress on to the next hole.

This is a picture I took from the 4th floor of Batam View Hotel, the colour of the sky is unlike anything I've ever seen before.

I guess my blog entry today is a little.. Um.. Brief. I guess I'm just tired. I've had a tiring 2 days, my liver was worked overtime yesterday due to my excessive consumption of alcohol, and my eyes are a little red due to saltier than usual sweat getting into them. Whatever is which, I'm gonna turn in now. I'll continue the 2nd part of my stories of people who have changed since I met them most likely tomorrow or friday. Until then, good night.

"Even after the darkest nights, morning always comes."

Things that have changed, part 1.

2009-11-21T23:45:00.009+08:00

I just realised, many things have changed since I entered my upper secondary years. For now, I'll highlight the most recent change that just hit me.

Last year, I met this girl named Annabel Lee, and she was in the same chinese class as me. We used to sit in pairs in rows, and she sat in front of me, while I sat with Jeremy Yeo. I clearly remember I didn't have much interest in chinese(it's still the same now), so I would always copy the answers for our chinese workbooks from her. Each time, she would willingly lend me her workbook to copy her answers, even though she knew that this was no bloody way that anyone was gonna learn chinese properly. Still, this arrangement went on for quite a while until the teacher changed my seat.

This year, we got a new chinese teacher, and that meant a new seating arrangement. A new year also meant a much more matured viewpoint on how we lived our everyday lives. Thus, I managed to interact with Annabel much more. And with that, we developed a friendship that has carried on to this day.

Throughout the year, I've had quite a number of good chats with her, always in chinese class. Through this, I have gotten to understand much better what kind of a person she is, and I am really thankful that I've gotten to experience this. Basically, the reason I decided to do this posting about Annabel is because I saw what she wrote on her facebook status yesterday. The issue she wrote about is something the both of us can relate to on a personal level, so then it hit me actually how far the friendship between Annabel and I has progressed. Sounds uncanny, but that was how it actually happened.

To wind it up, having our pictures taken together at graduation night is something I will really cherish for a long time to come. From the girl whom I once constantly turned to for answers for my chinese workbook to a girl whom I come to share a friendship with, thank you.

Well, this is the first of four parts of people who I realised have changed since I first them last year. How they have changed is something I would really know how to explain, but it's all in a good way.

"I march down this here desolate road, revelling in the stillness of life around me, cherishing the simplicity of silence."

Simplicity, 18/11/2009

2009-11-18T23:23:00.009+08:00

Hot damn, how long has it been since I have posted on my blog. The last time I wrote here, it was on the 19th of August. Today is the 18th of November, and that makes it just one day short of 3 months. A new record it is. So far, it has been a really memorable week, reason being I had my graduation night on Monday, and my graduation ceremony last Friday. This is a statement that I have officially graduated from Tanglin Secondary School, and that I have officially completed 10 years of education. For some reason or another, 10 years have seemed to have passed faster than the blinking of my eyes.

Let's see, I'll start with my graduation night, or prom, as what it is more commonly known as. That picture was taken before I left my home. I was experimenting with having my shirt tucked or un-tucked, and seeing which look would suit me more. In the end, I settled for having my shirt tucked in, more pictures will be seen further down. Tanglin Secondary's prom night was held at Concorde Hotel Singapore this year, and it was truly one of the greatest nights of my secondary school life. Upon reaching Concorde Hotel, I was immediately being asked to have photographs taken. It is little things like this that will help to preserve the memory of the fun we had during prom night.

These are some of the photographs that I took at prom night on monday, more are available on my facebook. Some of the people here like Jeremy Ang & Yeo, Jaryl, Joshua, Nicholas, Ying Kang, Victor, Kim Han; I've known them since I was in secondary 1. Others like Annabel, Sandra, Chin Aik, Firdhouse, Shafeeq, Emmanuel, J-ing, Wendy, Roxanne; I've only known them since last year. With the exception of Amanda and Alex, both of whom I've known since my primary school days, it doesn't matter how long I've known the people around me. All that matters is that I know I have left Tanglin Secondary School on a high note, and these are the people who were around me to celebrate our graduation. It is the things like these that makes us appreciate life even more, and this is because we learn to treasure the people around us even more, and it all comes to us when we are in secondary school. I've ran a good race lasting 4 years. I've been through many ups and downs, but I've also made many friends whom I shall remember and keep for a lifetime. That is how I want to remember my secondary school life. It was never perfect, but it was the lessons it taught me that made it complete.

I admit that I am seriously missing me the fun that I had at prom night, but the memories that I now have will always enable me to enjoy the fun have long after the party has ended.

"I find peace when I'm confused, and I find hope when I'm let down. Nevertheless, the fighting spirit within me will never be defeated."

O Level Chinese Results

2009-08-19T22:10:00.003+08:00

Oh hell, I got a C5 for my O Level Chinese.

And, yes, I am disappointed with my result. I thought I would do better. Maybe I was a little too complacent, or maybe I didn't revise enough for my Chinese. Whatever the reason, I'll have a second chance to rectify it later in the year as I have made up the decision to retake my Chinese, hopefully I can pull up my grade to a B3, if not a B4.

Well, I am thankful for one thing, and that is because I got a distinction for my Oral and Listening Comprehension. Actually, I thought I got a merit when I first heard my result, but when I checked again I actually got a distinction. I'm very surprised, really. But I have to admit, this is quite a pleasant consolation. So with this distinction, I feel more motivated to do better for the Chinese paper as I now have a higher chance of getting A "B" grade.

Frankly, I'm not gonna take my chances with this one. I'm taking it seriously, I'm gonna get something good out from my chinese. And this means no more goofing off in Mothertongue class. Ah well, it'll be a worthy sacrifice to get a good result for my Chinese.

"Intelligence is a virtue. Use it wisely, and not just to keep your head above the surface of the water."

Something brief.

2009-08-10T00:20:00.004+08:00

Interestingly, I've been thinking about this Saturday, since I got back from Jurong Country Club after practicing on the range. How can a golf ball withstand the force of a golf club impacting it. And I've not started talking about drivers impacting a golf ball, I'm talking about irons. When a golf ball is hit, its shape is actually compressed due to its resistance to G-forces. So, I'm wondering how a golf ball can actually absorb the force of a golf club impacting it and yet still keep its shape. All I know is that it's due to the outer covering of the golf ball. Guess I'll have to do more research about this.

Til then, have fun and good night!

New name for zebra crossings

2009-07-25T23:35:00.005+08:00

Hmmm, haven't exactly been blogging as of late, haven't been able to find the time. Been doing a hell load of studying lately, but I'll have to get used to this, damn.

So, attended english enrichment class this morning, pretty uneventful, but I must say Miss Manjit is letting more of her expertise of the language out in english enrichment class. After class ended, left school, went to Jurong East to walk around and buy some stuff, then went back home to rest before going to the library to meet Emmanuel. Sorry Emma, for arriving at the library so late, was feeling kinda lazy to leave my house.

Spent about an hour and a half at the library, then went to IMM to get a little snack. Crossing the zebra crossing, I overheard an amusing(well, to me, maybe) conversation between a young boy and his mom.

Boy: Mummy, this thing we're crossing is called the giraffe crossing right?
Mom: Uh, yes, this is called a giraffe crossing.

Me: Eh Emma, nowadays kids don't call it a zebra crossing, more like a giraffe crossing
Emmanuel: You damn ass sia you
Me: Giraffes must be sexy animals
Emmanuel: Bloody **** ***

Up to you on how you want to intepret the joke, Emmanuel and I found it a little amusing.

After Emma was done with his dinner, we headed home. Reached home past 9. Blast it, I didn't do any studying today. Damn. So, this is just a little silly post to liven up my blog. Here are some photographs that were taken recently in class, I was bored, so I decided to put my phone's camera to good use. Well, good night.

"Great minds think alike, but fools don't differ either."

Dum da dum dee da...

2009-07-19T23:24:00.003+08:00

"The golf swing is an explosion of power."
Best quote I've heard since the start of the year. I heard that on Sports@SG, and frankly, I couldn't agree more. Sounds a little biased, cos I'm a golfer, and I'm supporting this. But, it's true. The golf swing, even though it only lasts 5 seconds at most, is an awesome amount of energy generated in swinging a golf club with only a distance of 1.2 metres covered at most, yet the speed generated could be anywhere from 64km/h to 257km/h or higher(from what I know, the highest swing speed ever recorded was over 257km/h). But, this comes with a side effect. How many times have we heard even the fittest golfers pulling out from tournaments because of injuries to their backs, wrists or knees? I have had back and wrists injuries, with my latest addtion being my left knee. Yeah, I love this shit.

Anyway, enough about that. Just finished watching Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire on Channel 5. Missed its screening when it was still in cinemas, so I'm reduced to watching it on the telly. Spent my morning having maths tuition which ended at 1200 hours. Rested til 1500 hours, then went to the Frontier Library to meet Shafeeq and Firdhouse for studying. Raynee came later. Strangely, we had a real heavy laugh before and after Raynee came to join us. God damn it, I laughed so hard that I cried, unbelievable. Did our work til I had to leave at 1930 hours. Went to Jurong Point, purchased stationary and some dinner for myself and my sisters. Got home, planted myself in front of the telly and started to watch Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire.

Hot damn, that Emma Watson is such a magnificent rose. Personally, I feel that her beauty as a young lady starts to emerge from The Goblet of Fire movie. Hoo boy, somebody slap my face.

On a final note, this is to Raynee, Sheryl, Sherlyn and Eriza. You will never guess who that girl is. Unless you really do something to me which is quite threatening, I won't reveal who that girl is. So, happy guessing!

"Tears stream down my face as the rain splashes down around me. Why did it have to be this painful?"

Dark and crazy

2009-07-03T23:47:00.005+08:00

It's been a crazy whirlwind since Sunday til now.

On Sunday, the bikes belonging to my sister and me were stolen, fuck. I can't believe that even though the bikes were double chained, the thieves still managed to steal them away. And they took away my good lock, my coiled steel cable lock, they cut it and took it away. The bastards. I curse those guys who took my bikes to be knocked down by a car, then a truck, before getting run over by an even bigger truck.

Monday, askNlearn was screwy, or maybe it's just my computer. I can't access the lessons online, for who knows what reasons. Tuesday, the non-halal food that the school prepared for us was disgusting. Since Alex didn't come, I took his food, and I have to say that it is really poison, and I daresay prison food is better than what I got on Tuesday. Not to mention, my phone's software were bonkers in the afternoon, couldn't use the phone, shit.

Wednesday and Thursday were spent like normal school days, 'cept for Wednesday when I dropped my phone off for repair. Thus, I had to use a Samsung phone til today, and that Samsung phone is only 6.5mm thick... So, I don't feel secure with that phone as I could break it at any moment. Still, I'm glad that Emmanuel could cheer me up with his brand of "Gang Boss" sarcasm.

Today... I don't know what to say. Normal school day, went to pick up my phone after school, but before that had lunch with Ming Seng, Alex and Joana at Subway. I have to say, Subway's Italian B.M.T sub on Hearty Italian bread is an exceptional combination. Come to think of it, I had mine Double Meat and topped off with honey mustard sauce. Yummy. Came home to find out that my neighbour's bike had been stolen, and it could possibly be the same thieves. The ironic thing was that my neighbours had 3 locks securing the bike, but it still got stolen. Damn, those thieves sure are brazen, striking twice at the same level. I don't suppose this is done in desperation, more like in stupidity or insanity. Anyway, today was the day my family's domestic worker was flying home. I was glad that the whole family could have a nice meal at the ECP hawker centre together before sending my family's domestic worker off. Sending her off was pretty emotional for my mom, sisters and especially my family's domestic worker. Reason being, she's been with my family since 2006, thus she's pretty close to my sisters. Damn, I hate it when females get emotional. I was a little sad, but I did my best not to show it by joking with my Dad about who the hell was gonna wash my underpants once my family's domestic worker has flown home. Heck, watching her pass through the immigration and walking off while waving goodbye was pretty emotional for my sisters, in particular my younger sister as she was the closest to my family's domestic worker. Driving off from the airport, my youngest sister was crying as she was missing my family's domestic helper, damn. As I type this, my family's domestic helper should be nearing Colombo, Sri Lanka, and she's almost home. My home feels empty without my domestic helper, it really sucks, so it's my time to learn to be even more independent. It's time to accept reality.

"Saying goodbye is obviously one of life's most draining task, both emotionally and mentally. Reality is like schadenfreude, it never fails to laugh in the face of your losses and defeats."

Back to school!

2009-06-29T20:37:00.002+08:00

Well, today's officially the last day of my home quarantine. Glad it's over. Still, im thankful for this extra day off, as this allowed me to finish up any uncompleted homework.

Fuck it man, my O level Chinese oral is next week. Gotta get cracking on my Chinese again when I get back to school. Gotta start turning in earlier too, no more hitting the sack at 0100 hours, or sometimes 0230 hours. Really itching to play golf now damn it, but I'll be looking forward to seeing my classmates once I get back to school tomorrow.

So today will be a short post as I don't really have much to write. It's been a rather uneventful week, but I've saved a lot of money by not going out. Guess that's something good that came out of this week.

"A black hole... A tortured soul... A twisted mirage of life."

HOME QUARANTINE!

2009-06-24T11:09:00.003+08:00

So here's the lowdown, I've been put under home quarantine? Why? Well, I'm gonna explain.

As from my previous post, I arrived home from Batam on monday evening. Then, I got a call from Mr. Sia at around 5.30 pm yesterday. He confirmed with me that I had arrived home from Batam on Monday, then he told me that I had to be home quarantined til next Monday.

When I heard that, my first words to him were, "Are you crazy?" as I couldn't believe what he just said. In good humour, he replied back, "No, I'm not crazy. This is MOE's guidelines as Indonesia was added to the list of H1N1 affected countries today(Tuesday), and since you arrived back from Batam yesterday, you have to be home quarantined til next monday."

Yeah, I was kinda surprised, and also a kinda pissed off as this would mean that all my plans for the rest of the week would have to be cancelled. That means I can't utilize that movie voucher I have(it expires at the end of June) to watch Transformers. Sorry Qiu Zhi. To me, this is equivalent to being grounded by the Government for one week, but I'll use it to catch up on things I have to do at home. Damn.

And if you are still wondering, people who have arrived back from any of the countries listed on the list of countries affected by H1N1 since the 22nd of June(this includes Indonesia and Hong Kong), they have to be quarantined for one week from the date of arrival back into Singapore. So now, I still don't know how to utilize my time properly. Fuck it. It's only the 3rd day of my home quarantine and I'm feeling sick of it already. Someone call 993, damnit.

Somehow, it never occured to me that just going to Batam for 2 rounds of golf would lead to this. Anyhow, it's too late to do anything now. I want to complain, but I can't. Still, I don't blame anyone, better to let a small bit of the population suffer rather than let the whole country suffer just because of H1N1.

"I feel tormented, I feel agonized. Yet, all I can do is to lay in wait for this suffering to end."

A post after god knows how long?

2009-06-22T22:28:00.003+08:00

My oh my, it's been a long time since I've posted something. Guess I couldn't really find the time and the mood to blog.

And yes, I just arrived back from Batam not too long ago, I would say 4 hours? And I am actually much darker. Why? Well, try playing two rounds of 18 hole golf games over 2 days straight(not that I'm complaining cos I relish a challenge), but mainly because I'm stubborn and refused to apply sunblock despite the heat from the sun. And I shall always repeat my old philosophy, "sunblock is for wussies." Not to be forgotten, I broke my #6 iron! Oh heck, it's not the first time I've broken a club from my set, to be precise, it's actually the 2nd time, and I'm still trying to wonder how I do it because my golf clubs are steel shafted. Otherwise, I played pretty much fine. The golf courses in Batam are pretty and really natural, and playing there is much more relaxed cos you have a caddy to attend to your clubs and such. Plus, the seafood there is really dope, cos it's real fresh. I had some marine snails last night for dinner, and they were really awesome. Really enjoyed this trip that I had, interacting with the coaches, Dominic, Shawn, Shawn's dad and the other parents and their kids who went on this trip. Even though it was only a 2 day 1 night trip, it was well spent. Last night was spent relaxing in the hotel lounge, watching golf, drinking alcohol, eating a few snacks, listening to the singer belt out tunes and playing pool. Felt good to let it go and just do what I wanted, esspecially since there's plenty of stress nowadays.

Really want to go for another trip again, hopefully I can go to Bintan the next time round. Unfortunately, that would have to wait til the end of the O levels. Fortunately, it'll be much more fun, that's what I can be sure about.

"20 meaningful swings of a golf club are much more beneficial than 200 golf balls that were hit with total disregard."

Some week I had

2009-06-05T23:00:00.008+08:00

Wow, I'm alive. Well, albiet being kinda tired and feeling a little fatigued, I actually managed to pull myself through the first week of my school holidays. I've been surviving on very little sleep, averaging, say... 5-6+ hours a day? It taken a hell of a beating on my health, feeling very tired in school, could hardly concentrate for shit.

I'm just glad that I'll be able to sleep in tomorrow since it'll be a weekend. Attending my mom's friend's shop opening together with my sister tomorrow too, thankfully it is in the evening, or else I'll be making enough noise to wake the entire block tomorrow if they wake me up early. If you know me well enough, you'll know bloody well what kind of a person I can be if I let my mood or emotions control my behaviour. Trust me, it ain't cool. Ah, what the heck, I'll still have to go to school next week from monday to thursday, but the good thing is that it'll only be some extra remedial lessons for some subjects, lasting at most for 2.5 hours, with only one class a day, with the exception of wednesday. So, yeah, basically, I ain't complaining. Those classes start later too, thus it'll give me the chance to catch a few extra winks, and it will also end later, which is an excellent fact. Reason being, I've been arriving at school at like 0745 hours since tuesday, and have only been able to reach home close to 1900 hours due to the boot camp, and for the record, I ain't complaning! I thought my body was used to this kind of sleep deprivation torture, HOHO, how wrong I was!

Still, it's been a productive week, all these extra lessons and boot camp stuff, allowed me to learn a bit more. Never hurts to absorb a little more knowledge. Bought some new shoes too, and I'm happy with my purchase.

Now, next on my list, wait for the 3rd and 4th weeks of June, cos these are the two weeks which I will be able to have 18 hole games of golf! Itching to go to course, nothing beats the thrill of aggression and watching that golf ball soaring far and beautiful.

"Sword in hand, I am a valiant warrior. Bravery is my weapon, courage is my shield, and tenacity is my armour. To forge on, not back down, is my destiny."

What a day

2009-05-29T23:58:00.005+08:00

Today was the ultimate day of my secondary school life. Period.

It was Achievers' Day today, but I still had to attend school for the Chinese revision. What the heck, a final push for my O Level Chinese exam come monday. After class ended at 11, went home before heading back to school. But all that is irrelevant. It was the Achievers' Day performance today that took the cake.

Had to move all the percussion instruments to the hall for a last practice, and the band did it in 15 minutes, seriously a new record. We started to practice in the hall, Overture No. 1 for Wind Bands. Playing it, it felt relaxed, but I still had to get my notes right. Thank god I wasn't in my band uniform yet or else I would've melted in the heat. Practiced til 4+ pm, then we were given a break til 7 pm, which was our time to be dressed and ready.

At 7 pm, the band was ready and we just had to wait for the time to go down. Frankly, I don't know why I was isolating myself at times today, guess I just wanted to conserve energy and to have a clear mind for the performance. Before going down to the hall, the conductor gave the band a chance to appreciate the Secondary 4 members who were present. Aw man, Cindy, please don't cry. We will be back as alumni, so it's not like you'll never see us again. Before going down to the hall, I found out a blackout had occured(how cool), but still, the show must go on, and the band proceeded to the hall past 8.15 pm. Basically, we had to wait for over half an hour(prize presentation for teachers and valedictory speech by an ex-student), but a few minutes past 9 pm, it was finally our turn to perform.

I entered the hall first, set up my score and stood ready at attention. The conductor signalled us to sit down, and did a simple warm up of a single B flat note. Satisfied, he started the song. The snare drum and timpani started with such gusto, the starting note for the band was literally filled with power. Progressing through the song, the lower brass; tuba, euphonium and trombones, were just unbelievable, it was just strong. The cornet section was just awesome, their notes were loud and clear. The winds section; saxaphones, clarinets and flutes, were beautiful, melodic. The percussion, frankly, did what they were born to do; and that was to give the band the tempo with strength and will. The music played today was magic, because we stunned the entire hall. It was only until someone clapped that the whole hall erupted into applause.

Damn, I have to say, it's been a long time since I have been this happy. Finishing up the performance, the band headed down to the canteen for a de-brief. Mr. Alvin Tan congratulated us on a job well done, but still, there were some people who had to be comforted. Jian Ping, mistakes are imminent. When we were playing, I made mistakes too, everybody did, so don't take it too hard. You'll have more chances for performances as you're only in Secondary 2 this year. SYF 2011, do TSMB proud. So cherish the moments you spend in TSMB, cos it's something I doubt you'll regret. And Cindy, the Secondary 4 members will be graduating soon, yes, but just remember, it's nothing to get upset about, cos we will come back.

Yeah, this is the last performance for the Secondary 4 members, so for the thanks, I would like to thank Mr. Alvin Tan for motivating us from Tuesday til today(I was cursing and swearing at him in english, chinese and hokkien on Tuesday's full dress rehersal, and you do not want to know what I said), cos I feel that it really raised the band's morale tremendously. Miss Portia Tan and Mrs. Lee Shuin Nee, thanks. I know there were some questions that you two wanted to know why I didn't join the band in Secondary 1, but when I eventually did this year, thanks for making me feel comfortable and all. I really appreciate it. Thanks goes to TSMB too, even though I've only joined TSMB in January this year, I would like to thank all of you for making my time here enjoyable. My time in the band, well, is officially coming to an end. A 7 year journey, something which I will remember for a long time to come.

"Live your life by doing what you can do for others, and not just yourself."

A hectic week before my O Level Chinese

2009-05-27T21:51:00.006+08:00

Man, what a week I've been having so far. It's going to be Achievers' Day this Friday, so the band has been practicing for this event since last week. So far, it's been practice after practice since Monday, with a full dress rehersal yesterday and an extra one tomorrow(which I'll not be attending). Damn, it can really take a toll on my health, all these practices and sleeping late. Come the weekend, I'm gonna take a well deserved break.

Anyway, today was the start of the Chinese revision program, this is to prepare the students who are taking the O Level Chinese paper on monday just one last time. My god, when we were sitting in the hall for the lecture on the tips for the Chinese composition, I was thinking to myself, "Damn, this is worse than math on tuesdays." I will just grit my teeth(I don't think it's that hard really, I'm exaggerating) and continue on with this Chinese revision stuff, cos it will all be over(I hope) on Monday.

As I type this, I reminsce the times I spent in a school band. 6 years in the Shu Qun Primary School Brass Band, and 5 months and counting in the Tanglin Secondary School Military Band. Soon, it will all be over. My only regret on this? Not joining the band slightly earlier so as to experience what it was like to be part of a group of student musicians once again, and that is an experience I truly enjoyed while I was in the Brass Band of my Primary School. Because come friday, it could very well be my last performance in a band, and my last time in TSMB's band uniform in secondary school.

"My silhouette casts a shadow over the battlefield, a sinister and ominous feeling lingers in the air. I fear nothing, I only fear myself."

Humour, in a bad way

2009-05-23T23:56:00.006+08:00

One thing I'm sure about, and that is that my mother can be a 1st class comedian at times.

Well, my day was fine, went for golf traning in the morning at Mandai Executive Golf Course. Hell, I can hardly hit the ball straight, my swing is totally screwed after I took a break and didn't play for 3 weeks. I'm was getting quite angry, but nevertheless, I continued with my training until my hands were red and pain. So even as I type this post, my hand is still slightly red, not to mention blisters. But, to heck with the pain, cos I have gotten these since the day I picked up a golf club.

Came home after golf training, before I even stepped into my home, a quarrel had already ensued between my sister, my mother and me. The quarrel with my sister soon turned into a fist fight, and my sister took a fork and started to stab my arm with it, though I managed to hold her back. Thankfully, it didn't hurt much, although she did give me a small cut. To heck with this shit.

Later in the evening, I brought my bike to the bike repair shop near my home to fix my disc brake and chain. Fuck, my front disc brake rotor was totally screwed, and the dude at the repair shop said it had to be replaced. Hell, it would cost $50 to replace the disc brake rotor with a new one of the same model. Being a "good" son, I called my mother to ask her whether I should change the disc brake rotor. What I got instead was a scolding and a lot of unnecessary noise. Fuck it. In the end, my mother told me to install a conventional brake instead. Cos frankly, cycling with just one operational brake is hazardous to myself and the people around me, so safety first. So, yeah, now my bike has gone from having a front disc brake and a conventional rear brake to both front and rear tyres having conventional brake. But I'm not complaining, as long as I can stop my bike in... 5 metres or less even when I'm travelling at an excess of 40km/h, I'm relatively safe. Well, in my perspective maybe. One other thing I found out was that the bike shop also did suspension replacement, and prices started from $1oo for low-end suspensions. But after going through all that shit just to change one brake, I would rather not go through even worse shit to replace my front suspension.

Got home, and I discussed with my mother the possibility of changing my front suspension. But she said that the cost of my bike was $250, so far the repairs I've done have crossed the $100 by a bit, and if I actually do change my suspension, it would definately cost over $100(changing of tyres, inner tubings, chains, cos I'm looking at a mid-range suspension. So if I did change my suspension, the total cost of repairing my bike could possibly cross $250, which is the cost of my bike when it was new(I bought my current bike in late 2005/early 2006, I can't exactly remember when). In the end, my mother said that it's not worth to repair the suspension on my bike, so after the O levels, I will be getting a new bike. Well, that's one good thing that came out of a quarrel.

"I walk into a blood red sunset, yet my shadow is still a single shade of black. Whatever the cost, I hold total disregard to the sins taking place before my every stride."

My mid year examinations are finally over!

2009-05-18T23:38:00.008+08:00

Damn, somehow it felt like forever, but the mid year examinations are finally over. I feel a sense of relief, I can actually breathe a little easier, just for a short time, before I get back into studying for my O Levels.

So, after my last paper today, I went home to get ready for the class outing to Sentosa, but it had to rain even before I left school. Really wierd weather lately. Have to admit, I was damn late reaching Vivo City, but thankfully I was able to convince Jeremy to come for the class outing, so I wasn't the latest person to arrive. Played some balls games with Firdhouse, Eriza and Sheryl while waiting for Jeremy to arrive. Time wasting is good for health! So we entered Sentosa pretty late today, past 1500 hours?

Reached the beach and we put down bags. Immediately launched into a game of football, it was me, Joshua, Firdhouse and shafeeq against Emmanuel, Bernard, Alex and Kenn. It was a game filled with comedy, trauma, action, and not to mention cursing and swearing, well, maybe on my part. Jumped into the sea to cool down after the soccer game, man it felt good. In the sea, Joshua and Firdhouse once again got the "fantastic" idea of pulling off my pants, thanks guys. After that, I went for the Luge with Emmanuel, Alex, Bernard, Shafeeq, Sherlyn and Raynee. The first time we went up the skyride for our first Luge ride of the day, it felt so calming. The wind in our face, blowing softly, with the beautiful view of Sentosa all around us. It felt so serene. But, coming down was a different story. Dude! Going down the hill is the ultimate experience! Zooming down the hill at 40-50km/h(estimated), cutting the turns like some crazy fool, is truely dope, talk about an adrenaline rush! The people at the Sentosa Luge are right, "Once is never enough."

Headed back to the beach after the Luge, just for some more fun in the sea. Sent Emmanuel back around 6+ pm, after which I headed back to the beach to have more fun in the sea. But still, all good things had to wind down, and we had to get out of the water as it was getting dark, not to mention the tide was getting higher. Everybody decided to have a bath before leaving, so I stayed behind for awhile to relax to the sound of the waves crashing against the shore, and also to talk to Jeremy for a bit. Somehow, it felt very calming, a dark sky, only the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, and very little light around me. Helped me to think really clearly. Headed to the bathhouse after, erm, 15 minutes of thinking?

After my bath, headed back to the beach on the tram with Jerry, Kenn, Bernard, Firdhouse, Shafeeq, Joshua, Eriza, Sherlyn, Sheryl, Geraldine, Raynee and Farsihah. We took some shots on the tram(thanks Jerry) with some really funny poses. Packed up what remained of our stuff, and started to walk to the monorail station to take the tram back to Vivo City. Had a good talk with Shafeeq while on our way back to Vivo City, and I found out some unpleasant facts and truths about what's the current situation around me. But, whatever the case, I shall take it in my stride.

Reaching Vivo City, the class parted ways, Wendy went home, I went with Roxanne and Jeremy to eat at Food Republic, while the rest went to Banquet to have dinner. Having dinner with Jeremy and Roxanne gave us the time to have a good talk, something which we don't really have time for nowadays, so, I'm thankful for that. After dinner, I left Vivo City with Jeremy while Roxanne's dad came to bring her home. Going down to the first level, we met Douglas and Nicholas. We just stopped to say "hi" to them before proceeding to Harbourfront station. Conincidentally, Douglas and Nicholas met us again at the platform, so the four of us took the train home together.

Getting home, I was tired, but somehow I stil found the time to check my Facebook and I am now expecting a call from Emmanuel. One thing's for sure, I'm going to sleep like a pig tonight.

"I stand on the cliff, looking out towards the sea, the spring equinox takes place before me. The majesty of nature, a performance from the heavens."

Change of plans

2009-05-13T23:07:00.011+08:00

Ok, so here's the lowdown. I will not be getting a HTC smartphone after all. My pop checked with his friend, whom I assume is quite savvy with cellphones, and my pop's friend advised me not to get a HTC smartphone. Why? Well, according to my pop's friend, HTC smartphones don't really have a good battery life, and knowing that I can be quite rough(I ruined an Adidas watch and broke my steel shafted golf club in the past), phones which have touchscreens cut no ice with me, cos it could be a possibility that I'll end up damaging the phone.

Ah, what the heck. Looks like it'll be another Sony Ericsson cellphone for me, not that I'm complaining. For the record, this will be my 3rd cellphone from Sony Ericsson. Now the question is, which Sony Ericsson cellphone to get? Any suggestions? By the way, I'll not be getting another clamshell-style phone, cos that was what my past two phones were! And for the record, I detest Nokia, have no clue whatsoever on how to operate a Motorola, and I'm not really a fan of Samsung because of its weak battery life. Maybe I'm just biased, cos I've been using a Sony Ericsson for the past 4 years. Whee.

Sony Ericsson W705i

Sony Ericsson W902i

These are two of the cellphones I'm currently contemplating for purchase. Could change my mind. Who knows? My contract expired on the the 18th of March and I'm still using my old phone, quite amazing, I'm not really in that much of a hurry to get a new cellphone this time. My only hope is to get it by this month.

Just a short post

2009-05-10T18:30:00.006+08:00

I'm buying a new phone soon, but I'm a little stuck on what phone to get. I have 2 choices, get another Sony Ericsson cellphone, which would most likely be the Sony Ericsson W902i, or get a HTC smartphone, which would most likely be the HTC Touch 3G or maybe the HTC Touch Diamond.

Sony Ericsson W902i HTC Touch 3G

HTC Touch Diamond

Feel free to give me suggestions, cos I seriously need a new cellphone. My current cellphone, the Sony Ericsson W710i is over 2 years old already. Still, it's a good phone, and it has served me well, but it's starting to develop problems. Until then, I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

Sony Ericsson W710i

A rather hectic week

2009-05-08T22:50:00.007+08:00

Well, once again, I could not find the time to blog again for almost the past week. Revision for my mid-year examinations are really taking up a hell lot of my time. Still, I feel much better compared to last week, no more fucked-up moods, well maybe a little, but still, I feel much calmer today.

Still, some thought flashed back to my mind as I was sitting for the Social Studies paper yesterday. The questions in section "A" were about the 2008 Mumbai attacks which took place from the 26th-29th of November. So in the midst of the paper, I took a little time to reminisce about last year, the time I was in Bangalore and Mysore, State of Karnataka, India. Yeah, that was my 2nd school cultural immersion trip, the 1st trip was to Beijing and Nanjing, China, and that was back in 2007. I actually consider myself to be extremely lucky. My trip to India was took place from the 25th of October to the 5th of November, and the day which I arrived back in Singapore was exactly 3 weeks from the day which the Mumbai attacks were going to happen.

So, it was 3 weeks later, I remembered clearly, it was a thursday afternoon, I was on a bus, reading a copy of The New Paper, and I saw an article which said that students and teachers from another secondary school had to cut short their trip in India and return home to Singapore for safety reasons. So, I was very thankful that I was already back in Singapore, and safe from the threat in India. Sometimes, I really wonder why I am lucky, but thinking deeper makes me realise that I'm blessed, and so is my life, and I truely appreciate that fact.

The 7 guys, and Mr. Tan, in Bangalore

Anyway, enough of that. Today was the Literature and Biology exams, seriously don't wish to talk about it. I'm resting myself today, and having lunch with Firdhouse, Joshua, Douglas and Emmanuel at Ayer Rajah Hawker Centre after school was an ultimate humour lunch, there was so much laughter. Man it felt good. Heading to Emmanuel's house after lunch to play Xbox games was also a good way to relax my mind, I think. But still, almost everything in school is just one hectic mess nowadays, so I just hope all this crap ends fast so we can rest for a while during the June holidays. I'm already preparing myself for the boot camp during the June holidays, and hopefully the boot camp will help me to retain the knowledge I've learned in the 1st semester of the year. I don't expect good results for my mid year examination, so, DAMN. Guess I'll have to do my best to revise all my textbooks again, and score well for my O levels. Still, good friends really help to relieve the stress of everyday life, and I always felt good about that fact.

To hell with all this shit? Not for now, but it could soon be a possibility.

"The wind, the rain, the cold. A dance of the elements taking place in the darkness. That is my silent night."

Planning for Mother's Day

2009-05-02T23:17:00.008+08:00

As I type this, it's only 8 days away from mother's day. Funny, because for once, I've already planned what to buy for my mother. I remember earlier this week, I saw a CD review in LIFE!, and the review was about Ronan Keating's latest album, Songs for My Mother.

Even though this album cost $22.95, I feel that it would be worth every cent, since this album is specially released for Mother's Day. I know my mom said that "Son, you need not buy a gift for me come Mother's Day.", apparently I did not get the memo. Whee.

What I feel is that, since Mother's Day only comes once a year, let's just make it special. It'll be worth the effort, I hope.

The only bane to all this? My mid-year examinations! Still, this is not even the first stage of my year of examinations, because I still have the O Levels to go through. Well, it's already my 4th year in Tanglin Secondary, sooner or later, it'll just be another part of my memory.

"After all we've been through, this is not the time to be malevolent. The lives we lead are all empirical. To be resolute, that's the strength we need now."

It just keeps piling up

2009-04-30T23:37:00.005+08:00

I've been pretty busy lately, that's why I've been unable to blog. Too much homework, it just keeps piling up. Matter are made worse by an injury to my tailbone. Fuck it. God knows how the hell did I injure my tailbone.

My day today was fine, just lessons and more lessons, and a superbly boring lecture about our exams. I only had chemistry FOCUS today cos Mr. Tan, strangely enough, wasn't anywhere around. I went to Emmanuel's house after FOCUS. Burned some stuff, and just played some Xbox games. Never had quite so much fun in these stressed out and fucked up times.

Now, I'm just touching up my facebook here and there while watching K9 Cops on Animal Planet. That show is terribly interesting, can't actually imagine how would it be like if you had a German Shepard chasing after you and mauling your clothes to pieces. Yikes.

Well, my post today will be relatively shorter than usual. Enjoy the quiz I did today, forgive me for the profanities though. Good night.

"My mind is just a complete blank as I shoot bullet after bullet into a worthless idiot. He screams in agony, but his screams soon fade away, as he life drifts away. Blood pours out of the bullet holes in his body, and there he is, sitting in a pool of his own blood. But I just laugh an evil laugh, face and body splattered with that crimson liquid."

A quiz of some sort

2009-04-30T22:23:00.005+08:00

This is a quiz from Abigail. I'm feeling a little pissed of lately, so please pardon any profanities that might appear.

Technology:
1. What is the wallpaper on your computer?
A photograph of me doing a finish off.

2. How many Television sets do you have in your house?
2 Television sets

Biology:
3. Are you left or right handed?
I'm right handed.

4. As anything been removed from my body?
Not as far back as I can remember.

5. What is the heaviest thing you have lifted?
A whole bunch of weights weighing over 280 kilograms.

6. Have you ever been knocked out?
Hell no.

Bullshitology:
7. If it is possible, would you like to know the day you would die?
Nah. I'll leave that to fate.

8. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
My name is unique. I will never change it.

9. What colour do you think looks best on you?
I don't think it's one colour, more like red, white, brown and black.

10. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item?
Not as far back as I can remember.

Darelogy:
11. Would you allow one of your fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
Fuck no. How would be able to write or play golf properly?

12. Would you never ever blog again for $50,000?
I'll take the money, thanks, no guarantee I'll honour my word though. Muhahaha.

13. Would you drink a bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
It depends. What kind of hot sauce is that? And how big is the bottle?

14. Would you, without the fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
That depends too. Who is the person you want me to kill? It also depends on my occupation, if I were an evil man, I would say "YES!" without batting an eyelid. If I'm a good guy(like I am now), I'll pass. Thanks.

Dumbology
15. What is in your left pocket right now?
Who puts stuff in their pockets when they're wearing home clothes?

16. Is Napolean Dynamite a good movie?
What movie is that? Never heard of it.

17. Do you have hardwood or carpet in your home?
Nope. My floor in my home is covered completely with marble tiles.

18. Do you stand or sit down in the shower?
If I had a bath tub, I would sit down. But sadly, I don't have a bath tub, so I have to stand while I bathe.

19. How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
Just 1 pair. I'm a very practical person.

Lastology:
20. Who was the last person whom you text messaged?
My good buddy, Jaryl.

21. Who was the last person to call you?
"Gang leader" of the "Gang of 500", Emmanuel.

22.Last person you hugged?
Can I keep this one a secret? It's a private matter.

Favouritelogy:
23. Favourite number?
327

24. Favourite season?
I would have to say Spring.

25. Colour?
Black, red, white.

Currentlogy:
26. Missing someone?
Yes, very much.

27. Mood?
Pretty fucked up.

Randomlogy:
28. First place you went to this morning?
The dining area. I need to have breakfast you know.

29. What can you wait not to do?
End the exams so I can go and play GOLF!

30. Do you smile often?
I'm not so sure about that.

31. Are you a friendly person?
Give me your opinions.

Tag 10 people after you're done with this quiz:
I haven't linked anyone yet, I'll leave it to next time.

Mental Stress?

2009-04-24T23:29:00.008+08:00

My day for once, well, was filled with more pressure than usual. I had my Food & Nutrtion O Level Practical Exam today, and frankly, I could've done better. Let's just say I had to cook 3 dishes and 1 dessert, the dishes came out quite nicely, 2 of them were much better than I expected, the last 1 was, erm, just right, I guess? Thankfully I practiced cooking my dishes last night, so I knew what to do, the correct amount of ingredients to add, and how the dishes should taste like. I give thanks to my mom, she gave me constructive criticism on what I could've done better when I practiced cooking my dishes. Still, when it came to cooking the dishes, the mental pressure started to build up, bit by bit. In the end, I had trouble when it came to preparing my dessert. Combined with the constant nagging of the teacher, I seriously felt like throwing the dessert I was preparing out on to West Coast Road. I was so pissed off it felt like I could just go off at any time. But somehow or another, I managed to keep my cool and I completed my dessert. Proceeded to serve it up, and started to clean up the utensils I had used. Frankly, I do not deny the fact that I don't enjoy washing up, cos you have to soap and dry everything. I'll have to get used to it then, to hell with it. Still, I washed up all my utensils and clean up my cooking area, packed up my food and left the kitchen.

Proceeded to the canteen after leaving the kitchen. I was immediately greeted by Firdhouse and Faiz, and frankly, you two are savages! But in a good way, not to worry. Shafeeq, Farah and Initsar were there too, but it was mainly Firdhouse and Faiz who were devouring my food. Thanks guys, for not leaving me something to eat. But still, thanks for commending me on my cooking, made me feel that all my effort to cook up all these dishes were worth it.

To round up this post, my back still hurts! I don't understand how could I have injured the lowest part of my spine, and as a result of my injury, I can't play golf this week! Damn. And to make matters worse, I still have a stagnant injury in my left knee, I think this is due to pressure put on my left knee when I swing my golf club. Ah, hell, this looks like I've got a another trip to the chiropractor coming up. I really wish all these injuries would just disappear, so I would have more comfort in my daily activities. Just gotta nurse my injuries til they recover then. Damn bullshit.

"Walking along a desolate street, drops of rain splash down upon me. My body is overcome by the coldness of the rain. As the rain droplets flow down my face, for once, I feel a sense of serenity."

A Funky Day

2009-04-17T23:31:00.007+08:00

Today was kinda... Funky? Interestingly, there were 3 big boxes filled with packets of tortilla chips in the kitchen. Attempted to smuggle one out but failed. Damn. Anyway, today being International Friendship Day with a Mexican theme, classes ended at 1000 hours to allow us to have recess. The assembly was, erm, fine I guess. The skit was interesting, but I ran to the toilet once the mass dance started. Like come on, who wants to dance? Certainly not me. Had to go back to the hall in the end. Damn. Still, getting back to the hall wasn't all bad. They started play "La Bamba", and Firdhouse loves this song. It has an awesomely catchy beat, quite addictive in a certain sense. And I just couldn't resist gyrating my hips to that song, garnered quite a bit of attention from 4E4, 4E3 and 4E2, didn't expect that. I think Bernard or Jeremy kicked me and I fell, didn't hurt, but it was funny. After the mass dance, proceeded to the 4th floor to watch the mini-torch relay and a performance by the contemp dancers. I went to the kitchen with Jerry to collect tortilla chips! Tasted good, the cheese was cold and rubbery though.

Went for lunch with Jaryl after school, then went back to school to wait for the bus to bring us to Sembawang CC to have our school golf training. Felt kinda stiff, must be due to my back injury. Still, I didn't hit too badly after warming up. Ended my school day by taking a cab home with Jeremy.

Still, I don't understand why must my mom quarrel with me over my chinese. I know the O level paper for chinese is in June, but just leave me alone, I can handle things myself. For the love of all things pure and beautiful, I'm, like, 16! Give me some space, damn it. I'm feeling pissed off as I type this post, can't stand my mom at times, but she means well, and so does my dad. Sigh, what do I do? Just take in my stride. To hell with it.

It's a pretty warm night as I type, sweating a little. Could really use some natural wind like the ones we had earlier in the year. Nice, cooling, refreshing wind. Magnifique.

"The horizon is just beyond me, but you are there beside me. Being with you gives me a tranquil feeling I rarely experience. In your midst, my heartbeat is just a romantic whisper."

A Discovery After 7 Years

2009-04-15T23:55:00.004+08:00

Flashback to April 2002.

It was just a few weeks after I had turned 9 years old, and I was taking part in my first SYF. At that time, I was still in ShuQun Primary School, and I was part of the school band, playing the baritone. And frankly, the band wasn't very well prepared for the SYF. Let alone me, I couldn't even play half the score. All this spelt imminent doom.

The trip to Singapore Conference Hall was a noisy one even when we were supposed to keep quiet to conserve our energy. Getting there, our 10 minutes in the tuning room was an absolute terror, we couldn't get our notes right. Going on stage, we played our set and choice pieces, both of which sounded horrible. Somehow, I had no idea what was going to be the outcome. Guess I was too immature to realize how bad the situation was.

When the results were announced, we had attained a certificate of participation. It was unreal. The moment I heard the result, I just threw my head back on the seat and looked up at the ceiling, wondering what had the band come to. Walking back to the bus, many people started to shed tears, and the journey back to school was deathly quiet, no one was in the mood to talk. And the strangest thing was, throughout the whole time I was practicing for the SYF, I had no idea what the name of the score was. All I knew was that it was titled "ShuQun 2002" and it was composed by James Swearingen.

Back to today, at band practice. We were praticing for an upcoming performance, and Adhi said to play this song called "celebration" and I was like "what did he say?", so other people around me said "Celebration for Winds and Percussion", only then did I know what was the song. Just then, I heard Brenda playing the melody of the song, and the melody sounded so damn familiar. So I asked Cheryl and Geraldine to play the melody of the song, and at once, it hit me that this was the song back from 2002, the one which I got a C.O.P with. I could not believe my ears. I never actually thought the song would come back to haunt me. Shafeeq had to announce to the whole band that this was the song I got a C.O.P for(thanks bro), but it reallyt made feel a little better. Still, I just couldn't play the song right. Firstly, I'm unfamiliar with the score. Secondly, the bad memories from playing this score are still fresh in my mind, and I'm distracted. Damn

7 years, it took me, to find out the damn title of the song I played for my SYF in 2002, and the song title is "Celebration for Winds and Percussion". Well, I finally discovered it today, and at least I know that I can finally find some relief for the pain I felt back in 2002, which haunts me to this very day.

"It may have already been so long, but that inferno still rages within me. It can't be extinguished, and it can never be extinguished. Pain will always reside within me."

My Butt Hurts

2009-04-12T23:25:00.004+08:00

For once, I actually woke up before 0800 hours on a weekend, but only after a call from Jaryl woke me up. Funny, I did set my cellphone alarm, but it didn't ring. Screwy phone.

Got out of the house at 08oo hours, and got on my bike to cycle from Taman Jurong to West Coast. I think the distance is 9 km, and it took me 45 minutes to get there. Met Jeremy and Jaryl, but then I found out that Jeremy had no bike. Made a call to Emmanuel, who graciously agreed to lend Jeremy his bike(thanks Emma). Proceeded to West Coast park to cycle after borrowing the bike, where the three of us just went round and round the park. I have to admit, cycling in the morning, with all that fresh air blowing in your face, man, it really perks you up. Something I really dislike about my bike is the seat. It's narrow, and hard, and it causes my butt great pain after I cycle for 10 km or more. I've been wanting to change it, but I'm just lazy to do it. Hell, I'll just put up with it. Plenty of puddles around West Coast park today, considering that it rained yesterday. Went through the puddles and got my t-shirt pretty dirty, but the splashes of muddy water on my t-shirt looked like abstract art, really interesting.

We finished off our morning cycle at about 1100 hours, returned the bike to Emmanuel, and started to go our own ways. Jaryl cycled off in a different direction for home, while I accompanied Jeremy to the bus stop. Waited for the bus with Jeremy, after which I cycled home, and my butt was seriously hurting like the glare of a thousand suns.

As each days passes, the O levels draw closer, and I'm getting pretty worried. Ah hell, only time will tell what becomes of me. And Yi Ling, the show's name is CSI: Miami, not CMI: Miami! Please watch the show in future and get the name right!

"I stand by the water's edge, watching it flow down the mountain creek, and I wonder if life could ever mimic the flow of water, whether it could ever flow smoothly. Truth is, that is a mirage within reality."

A Beautiful View

2009-04-10T23:55:00.005+08:00

Today, I wondered to myself, "Why the hell didn't I go for a flight on the Singapore Flyer earlier last year? The view is dope!"

Frankly, I have seen such a beautiful, unobstructed view of the Singapore skyline in my life. It was magnificent. I could see the Marina Bay Golf Course, the old Supreme Court, the Marina Barrage, and most of the Kallang River. Trying to imagine how would it be like to watch the Singapore Grand Prix from the Singapore Flyer. Hearing the roar of that high revving V8 engine and admiring the scenic Singapore skyline. One word, sexy. It's really amazing, our country is small, but when you are in a capsule that is on the perimeter of a gigantic rotating wheel, and there you are, almost 200 metres above the ground. You will see things that will take all eternity to explain. It's local magic at its best.

My Dad & I

Strangely, I actually contemplated bringing a hammer along with me, just in case the wheel once again stopped(touch wood), and I had to break the cabin glass so as to allow me to relieve myself. Still, I doubt the hammer will make it through the security checks. Those security chaps run your belongings through a scanner, and you have to walk through a metal detector. For once, I walked through a metal detector and the damn thing didn't go off like a fire alarm like those at airports. Yes, we all know it's for out safety, but it's an invasion of privacy! Here's a thought, suppose you have metal in your body(say screws or plates inserted into you during operations), what is gonna happen when you walk through a metal detector?

Ended my day by doing homework. Can't seem to think lately, I need to find some ways to relax, like now, breathing in that cool night air is a great way to instill tranquility within me.

Still, something funny happened earlier in the day. If a teacher calls up parents to inform them of their child's behaviour, something they would say could be, "Your child is too noisy in class." Ever heard of a teacher calling up parents to say, "Your child is too quiet in class." Well, it happened to my youngest sister, and my mom got a call from her form teacher just because of that. Like, what the hell man! That is plain atrocious! Calling up parents to tell them their child is too quiet? Like, come on! Think of something better to call a parent for, like, "Your child punched me in the face and called me a fat b******." That would be more interesting right?

"As I stand atop a hill, I gaze up at the stars in the skies above me. A sense of tranquility descends upon me, and for a moment, I feel that tender emotion. Love."

From The Past To The Present

2009-04-07T17:03:00.011+08:00

With the amount of incidents that happened to me lately, I wanted to let some of it out, and to clear my mind a little bit.

Flashback:

1/4/2009

This was the day of my third and final SYF. Suprisingly, I woke up feeling calm, unlike my previous 2 SYFs when I woke up and started feeling tense. Once I was in school, the reality of how much time we actually had left before the start of our SYF was less than 3 hours, but somehow, that sense of urgency just wasn't there. As we practiced for the last time, that sense of urgency somehow still did not hit me. As we left to board for the bus, we ended up waiting for it at the porch. Apparently the bus was late, and the irony that I was daydreaming a little when Cheryl suddenly said "band sedia!". I was like, "Huh? What? Sedia for what?" because I didn't see anyone who needed the greeting of the whole band. Actually, it was Mr. Lim, our VP, so I thought "Oh..." . Nice way to start the morning...?

Even though Tanglin got a bronze award, as we left the Singapore Conference Hall, I couldn't help thinking whether I could've have reduced the amount of mistakes I made while playing, and maybe whether I could've added a bit more flair into my music. But I realised after a few minutes, playing in a band is a team effort, so the award we got that day was true testament to the fact that we needed to work much harder if we wanted to get better awards in future SYFs. Before we left the Singapore Conference Hall, I had a small chat with Amanda and Geraldine, and the conclusion to that chat was that the colour of a bronze award was that of a slightly rusty saxaphone, something like dirty gold, not pretty nor ugly(well, in my preception).

But what the heck, our standard didn't go up, but neither did it drop. The end to my final SYF was that I was neither happy nor sad, and I had no sweet or bitter tastes in my mouth, so it was a neutral emotion I was experiencing. I just felt empty, my time spent preparing for the SYF with the band was over. When I joined the band in the 3rd week of January, I never expected for the months to fly by so fast, but it did. 2 and a half months were gone, just like that. Damn. But in that 2 and a half months, I made new friends, and nutured stronger friendships with the people whom I already knew. It felt good to know, in some way or another, I was part of the band. Thank you, TSMB.

7/4/2009

What started out as a smooth day went crashing downhill during math lesson. Mr. Sia was teaching 4E4 the unit on taxes, and lo and behold, I had to have the damn misconception that he spelt out a word wrongly, so I started to voice out my opinions in a loud manner. I knew my actions pissed him off real bad, as he just threw his marker on the table and said to 4E4(even though I knew it was meant for me), "If you guys think your english is so good why not you come up and teach the class?!", after which he stormed out of the classroom. I was kind of in a state of shock, as I didn't expect him to have such a reaction. Then it occured to me, I needed to get him back to class, but Mr. Sia was too angry that he didn't even bother listening to my apology as he stormed to the staff room. Even when I ask Ms. Lim to tell him that I was sorry, his reply was that he didn't want to talk to me, an indication of how angry he was. Even as he walked backed to class, I could still tell that he was angry. And when he told 4E4 that he had decided to quit teaching us math, and instead let Mrs. Peggy Koh be our math teacher, it was totally unexpected.

Even though he continued and completed the lesson on taxes, it was obvious that he was hurt and angry. And as 4E4 walked out of the classroom, I was asking myself why the hell did I say all that shit. In a certain sense, I think what caused Mr. Sia outburst of anger was my defiance and me trying to act smart. So during recess, I headed back to class to talk to Mr. Sia, and found out that there were a few other incidents(he didn't specify what incidents) that also caused him to come to that dreaded decision. What he wanted was for the class to pay more attention during his lessons, and even though I tried my best to convince him not to quit being our math teacher, he simply said that he'll think about it.

This whole incident really shows how the wrong words can hurt a person's pride. I accept full responsibility for this incident, as this was entirely my fault. Jeremy and Kim Han are right, I should really learn how to keep my mouth shut.

Even though he thought us during the math remedial, personally, I felt that something didn't feel right. So when Mrs. Peggy Koh relieved 4E4 for our form teacher's period, she took the time to tell us a little slice of Mr. Sia's life. The effort he puts in to prepare worksheets for us, the time he puts in to mark our assignments, even sacrificing his sleep and saturdays so that his students exceed their learning potential. This is an ultimate testament to the fact on how dedicated a teacher he is, and how much he cares for his students. I really take my hat off to Mr. Sia, as a teacher like him is really special. Frankly, he deserves an award of the highest honour for his dedication. Without Mr. Sia, his stringent rules and many fines, I don't know what I'll be like, possibly someone who will not be very disciplined and just turns off when it comes to math.

Like what Mrs. Peggy Koh said, "Mr. Sia does not want to be a candle that just spends itself and not give out any light at all". So once again Mr. Sia, I'm sorry for what I said to you in class today, and from the bottom of my heart, I thank you for the effort that you have put in for 4E4.

"As my surroundings fade into oblivion, here I stand, alone, with my head bowed, wondering to myself, what could I do to make it seem like no faults ever took place. Truth is, reality is evil, and it does not allow me to repent on my sins, and like a curse, it stays with me for all eternity."

My First Post

2009-04-05T00:56:00.010+08:00

Looks like this is my first post. I've been wanting to create a blog for quite some time now, but I've always been putting it off because I was just too lazy to do it. Guess I need the movtivation to do certain things.

First, I would like to thank my sister, Yi Ling, for this. She assisted me in creating this blog. In spite of how much we quarrel, my sister(somehow) will always help me with things which I haven't the foggiest on where to begin.

Lately, many things have happened to me, and many thoughts have been floating about in my head. I need to get some of it off my chest, and maybe get some opinions of my thoughts. I've also been wondering whether I should see the school counsellor, as I found that sharing with an adult authority helped most of the answers to my questions to surface, the remaining answers, I thought them out. Still, it feels better to get my problems off my chest, allows me to breathe a little easier for a little while. For the record, this is not the first time I've been to see the school counsellor. Back in secondary 2, Miss Lai actually wanted to refer me to the counsellor as I was constantly talking about horny shit in class. It didn't just happen once or twice, it happened more than 5 times, if I can remember correctly(I'm not exaggerating).

As I look back at my 16 years of life(or as far back as I can remember), I was pretty immature from primary school all the way till secondary 2. Come secondary 3, I faced more homework(?), naggier teachers(maybe not all of them) and parents(yes, my parents became naggier), and more stress, both physically and mentally. To me, I guess maturity comes with age, and I was pretty immature from primary school and throughout my lower secondary years. As I look back at what I did, mischief, naivety, and a really crappy attitude, those were the reasons I guess. Now that I'm 16, I look back and think, "4 years of secondary school have really passed too fast. I can't believe it's all going to end in a matter of months." Whatever time I have left, I'll spend it well, and I'll spend it to my fullest. Even as I look ahead, I think back, remembering the stings, the calm, the joyous, the emotions I've experienced time after time in my 16 years. Even though there is some regret that lingers in my life, I don't regret most of it, because the decisions I made moulded me to what I am today.

So even as my mind whirls in confusion, the cool night air brings my mind back into a tranquil state, finally allowing me to feel calmness.

"The winter solstice begins, a chilly breeze brushes my face. There I stand, unwavering, even as the snow falls around me. Resilience will be my shield, and resilience will carry me through"